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Microsoft
TV Dinner Product Insert
You must first remove the plastic cover. By doing so you agree to accept and
honor Microsoft rights to all TV dinners. You may not give anyone else a
bite of your dinner (which would constitute an infringement of Microsoft's
rights). You may, however, let others smell and look at your dinner and are
encouraged to tell them how good it is. If you have a PC microwave oven,
insert the dinner into the oven. Set the oven using these keystrokes: <\mstv.dinn.//08.5min@50%heat//
Then enter:
<ms//start.cook_dindin/yummy\|/yum~yum:-)gohot#cookme. If you
have a Mac oven, insert the dinner and press start. The oven will set itself
and cook the dinner. Be forewarned that Microsoft dinners may crash, in
which case your oven must be restarted. This is a simple procedure. Remove
the dinner from the oven and enter <ms.nodamn.good/tryagain\again/again.crap.
This process may have to be repeated. Try unplugging the microwave and then
doing a cold reboot. If this doesn't work, contact your hardware vendor.
Many users have reported that the dinner tray is far too big, larger than
the dinner itself, having many useless compartments, most of which are
empty. These are for future menu items. If the tray is too large to fit in
your oven you will need to upgrade your equipment. Dinners are only
available from registered outlets, and only the chicken variety is currently
produced. If you want another variety, call Microsoft Help and they will
explain that you really don't want another variety. Microsoft Chicken is all
you really need. Microsoft has disclosed plans to discontinue all smaller
versions of their chicken dinners. Future releases will only be in the
larger family size. Excess chicken may be stored for future use, but must be
saved only in Microsoft approved packaging. Microsoft promises a dessert
with every dinner after '98. However, that version has yet to be released.
Users have permission to get thrilled in advance. Microsoft dinners may be
incompatible with other dinners in the freezer, causing your freezer to
self-defrost. This is a feature, not a bug. Your freezer probably should
have been defrosted anyway.

 
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