Dial 911 immediately.
Open the curtains to see if anything has changed over the past 2 years.
You mean there's something else to do?
Threaten your ISP with an impeachment vote.
Re-introduce yourself to your immediate family.
Get that kidney transplant you've been putting off.
[All jokes are believed to be in the public domain. If you feel one of these belongs to you, please let us know the details and we will either remove the material or provide a link at your request.]
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